NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
tonight lets celebrate not being married
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
