you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
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