Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
Randomize
