Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Randomize
