your room smells of hookers.
And success
the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
