remember that night we drank a bottle of vodka and went to mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu, twice?
we can't do that now- first b/c they got rid of that menu and 2 b/c we are broke now. damn this recession.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
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