Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Its bad when you wake up with a penis drawn on your face. Its worse when you find out its traced..
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
we need to tell them stories about when happens when we're sober so they think they know what they're in for when they're actually completely unprepared for whn happens when we get drunk
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
