you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Randomize