My pussy is not your playground.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
