His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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