apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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