you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Randomize
