when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Randomize
