wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
