I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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