I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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