Rock
Scissors
Fuck
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Randomize
