I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
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