I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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