Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
Error 1684C: You're last text was undeeliverable. Subscriber is our to the aera.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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