My liver just broke up with me...
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
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