Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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