my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
Randomize