I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I only want to screw him when I'm drunk. Problem is I try to be drunk as often as possible
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
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