i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
I'm not saying i'm drunk
But i'm drunk.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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