I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
