you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
