would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize