i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
