Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Randomize
