what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
