Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
Randomize
