I must be too annoying 4 u.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
Randomize
