he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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