yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
Randomize
