Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I'm not driving across town for three thrusts and an excuse
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
Randomize
