it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize