Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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