She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Opening beer with my teeth is getting easier the drunker I become.
It turns out my teeth are bleeding.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
