Non-Jews are for practice
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
