carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
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