yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
