What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
Dude, a dry wedding reception should nullify the vows, because really, without the booze, you might as well be 5 years old again and playing dress-up
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
