small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
and i looked up. we had an audience...
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
Randomize
