Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Did we use protection last night?
Um, no...keep in touch, okay?
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Unemployment check just came in. As soon as I stop pretending I have morals I'm buying weed. Puff puff pass uncle sam.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
