WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Couch. On fire.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
