Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Randomize
