is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Randomize
