Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
