How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
the liver wants what the liver wants
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
