she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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